奇书网

附录一 What I Believe1（第1页）

附录一WhatIBelieve[1]

Myfather，Hu，wasasdamanwillandadmiy。Afteraperiodofclassiiureandhistory，hetookgreatihestudyofgeography，espethegeographyofthefrontierprovioPekingand，withaletterofintroduhispocket，traveled42daystoKirininNorthernManchuriatoseetheImperialissioa-，ntoEuropeanSinologuesasoarchaeologistsina。

Wureceivedhimahe。“Nothing，”saidmyfather，“exceptletmefollowyourmissioheboundarydisputewithRussia，sothatImaystudythegeographyoftheernprovinces。”WuwasihisscholarwhohadtakenonlyhisfirstdegreeieraryexaminationsandeerthelosidetheGreatWall。Hetooktheyoungmanwithhimonhishistoriandfoundhimamostvaluableandhard-wassistant。

&imemyfather’spartylostitswayinaandotgetoutfor3days。Provisioedaeringhadfailedwheasearchbemadefstreams，whichrobabilityflowoutoftheforest。Astreamwasfouyfolloweditscoursetosafety。Myfatherposedaloocelebratethiso。WheerIusedthisiasanillustrationinapaperonProfessorJohheoryofsystematig，severalsurvivingayfatherstillreizedthissthIhadionedhisname，aoinquireifIwasayoungerson-departedfriend。

AlthoughWuTa-meothegoveras“amancapableprovinces，”myfatherneverachievedpolitiierbeinganoffigsuandFormosa，diedattheageof55whenFormosawascededtoJapaheSino-Japanese>

*　*　*　*

Iwastheyousonofmyfatherandtheonlyother。Hemarriedthreetimes。ThefirstwifewaskillediaipingRebellion，whiyhomedistrisouthernAnhuiaoashes。Byasearriagehehadthreesonsandfhters。Theeldestsoobeanincibledegeanearlyage。Whehissedwife，hewrotehomethathehaddearryagirlofthegood，sturdystockofthefarmerclass。

Mymother’sfatherwasafarmerracticedtailtheoffmonthsoftheyear。HearespectablefamilywhichwasmassagtheTaipingRebellion。Beingonlyasmallboy，hetiveaoserveinthearmyoftheTaipings。Topreventhimfraway，fourcharacters—“Tai-pingTien-kuo”（HeavenlyKiingPeace）—werebrandedonhisfadremaihroughouthislife。Buthemaoesd，afterterriblehardship，returohishomeonlytofinditieruinswithoutasinglememberofhisfamilyleftalive。Heworkedhard，ghislandandpragtail，whichhehadlearcamp。Hegrewup，married，andhadfourymotherwastheeldest。

Mygrandfather’slifeambitionwastorebuildthefamilydwelliroyedbytheTaipings。Everymbeforesunrisehewouldgototheriverside，selectthreeheavyloadsofstone，aripscarrythemonhisshoulderpoletothesiteofhisruiheartularworkinthefieldorintail。Wheureiernoon，hewouldmakethreemoretripsandcarrythreemoreloadsofstoneforhisfuturehousebeforehesatdowhishardandperseveringworkwassilentlywitnessedbymymother，whrettedthat，beingagirl，shewasunableinanywaytolighteher’shardshipaherealizationofhisdream。

&hematchmakerwhometmygrahefieldandpleadedeloquentlyonbehalfofmyfatherforthe“birthdate”paperofhiseldestdaughter。Mygraedtotalkitoverwithhisfamily。Butwheheproposaltohiswifeintheevening，shewasveryfurious。“Never!”shesaid，“Howyouthinkofgivinghtertoaman30yearsolderthanshe?Andsomeofhisareolderthanhter!Moreover，peoplewillnaturallythinkthatwe，ingivingirltoanelderlyofficialaresagherforthesakeofmoability。”Sotheoldcouplequarreled。Ihefathersaid，“Letussultthegirlherself。Afterall，it’shero>

&hequestionlaothersheremai，aswasusualwithesegirlsinasimilarsituatiohinkis。Tomarryamiddle-agedn-upmeantthattheoothebride’sfamilywouldbemuchmorethaninane。Thatwouldbeagreathelptoherfather’sbuildis。Andshehadseenmyfatherbeforeahewasreveredbyeverybodyi。Sheadoredhim，andwaswillingtomarryhim，partlybecauseofasenseofheroworship，butchieflybecauseofherfilialafather。Sowhensheressedbyherparentsforananswer，shesaidresolutely:“Ifyouthinkheisagoodman，I’llobey。Afterall，amanofforty-sevenisnotveryold。”Mygrandfathersighedwithreliefwhe，andmygraoutifury:“Soyouwaai（lady）ofamandaribe!”

*　*　*　*

Mymotherwasmarriedin1889attheageof17，andIwasborninDecember，1891。Myfatherdiedin1895，leavingmymotherawidowat23。Byhisdeath，shebecameheadefamilywithmanygrown-upstep。Thepositionofaesestepmotherisproverbiallydiffidherlifefromthistimeoeriodofpatientsufferingandpainstakingise。

MymiftwasforbearaoryrecordsthateroroftheTangdyriargKung-ibylehisfamilyhadmaolivetogetherfeionswithoutseparationordivision，thegrandoldmaospeak，requestedleavetowriteouthisanswer，aeahuheword“Forbearaheesemoraliststlycitethisstoryofthe“HundredForbearahebestexampleoffamilylife，buthemseemsevertorealizetheterribleamount，fri，suppression，andinjusticewhichhavemadeforbearanabsolutey。

Ill-feeling，dagger-likewords，hostilelooksoofthestepdaughters-in-law—mymotherboreallthispatieimesshefoundherselfreagherlimitofforbearaheayihemalyweepaltheearlylossofherhusbaioheoffendingdaughter-in-lawnortheoffeimethesetearshadanalmostmiraculouseffect。Iwouldinvariablyhearadooropenintheroomofoers-in-law，aepsofawomanwalkiio。Presentlyshewouldreturnandknockatthedoorofourroom。Shewouldehacupofteaaomymother，implhertoceaseweeping。Mymotherwouldtakethedaccepthersilentapologies。Thentherewouldbepeathefamilyforaboutamonth。

Althoughsheeitherreadherstakedallherhopeoion。IrecociousdbeforeIwasthreehadlearnedover800characters，whichmyfathertaughtmeeverydayonsquareslipsofpileafterthree，Iwasalreadyinschool。Iwasthenasicklydcouldhardlyclimbadoorstepof6in。withoutassistaIcouldreadandmemorizebetterthaherboysintheseverplayedwiththeofthevillageand，bepletelackofchildplay，IwasgiventheniameofShieer）whenIwasfive。Fifteeer，ativersity，Iwasniamed“DoIhomore，andforthissame>

Mymothereverydaybeforedaybreakaupihentellmeallshekmyfather。Shewouldsaythatsheexpectedmetofollowthefootstepsofhimwhowastoherthebestahateverlived，amanwho，shesaid，wassomuchrespectedthatallopiumdensandgambliheviitysuspendedbusinessduringhisoalsojouroldmethatIandheronlybymygooddbyatsinscholarshipandiexaminations—thatwhatevershewassufferingwouldberewardedbymydiligentappliystudies。Iwouldoftehhalf-opesherarelygaveupthismsermowhensomeladyguestwasstayingwithusinthesameroom。

Whendaylightcame，shewoulddressmeaoschool。Wheleolder，Iwasalwaysthefirsttoarriveatskeacher’sdoorforthekeytoopentheschoolgate。ThekeywashahroughthesmallcrevithetwodoorsandIwassooreadingaloudmyassigheschoolwasnotdismissedtilldusk，wheneachboybowedtothebigpictureoffurubbingaeadweheaveragelengthoftheschooldaywas12h。

Whileallowingmenochildplayofanykind，mymavemeeveryeinmychildishattempttobuildatempleofworshipte，fucius。Ilearhisfromthesohalf-sister，aboy5yearsmysenior。Hehadbuiltapapertempleoffuciuswithallkindseouscolorpapers，anditattractedme。IusedabigpaperboxasthemainhallofworshipandcutabigsquareholeonitsbacktowhichIpastedasmallerpaperboxastheinhetabletoffucius。TheouterhallwhereIplacedthegreatdiscipleswasdecoratedwithminiaturesrittehegreatsageiedfrommyempleandpartlyfrombooks。Iickswerefrequentlyburoytempleandmymotherrejoimychildishpiety，secretlybelievingthatthespiritoffuciuswouldsurelyrewardmebymakingmearenownedsdsuccessfuldidateieraryexaminations。

MyfatherwasaclassicalsdasterheNeo-istRationalPhilosophyofChuHsi（1130–1200A。D。）。HewasstronglyopposedtoBuddhismandTaoism。Irememberseeingonthedoorofmyuncle’shouse（whichwasmyfirstschool）asun-bleabearingthewords“NoAlmsforBuddhistMonksorTaoistPriests，”which，IlearerartoftheRationalisttraditiobymyfather。Butmyfatherwasdead，myscholarlyunlefthometobeeapettyoffiorthernAnhui，aherswereinShanghai。

ThewomehomewereundernoobligatiohisRationalistiyfather。Theyobservedtheusualritesofaorworshipaoworshipwhereverandoledthem。Kwan-yin，theGoddessofMercy，wastheirfavoritedeity，andmymother，chieflyoutofherayformyhealthandwell-being，wasadevoutbelieverofKwan-yin。Iremembergoingwithheretoatempleofthisgoddessonamountaieofthebouwhiedherthroughoutherlife，walkedthewholedistanceofhillytrailtoandfromtheshrine。

Iwasinthevillageschool，ofwhichthereweresevenine，for9years（1895–19whichtimeIreadahefollowingbooks:

1。TheBookofFilialPiety，apost-classio。

&aryLessons（or“TheSmallLearning”），abookofNeo-istmoralteaonlyattributedtotheSungphilosopher，ChuHsi。

3。TheFourBooks:TheAsoffucius，TheBookofMeLearniriheMean。

4。FouroftheFiveClassics:TheBookofPoetry，TheBookofHistory，TheBookofdTheLiKi。

Mymother，ayseiherhouseholdexpeedonpayileastthricebetterthauitionfee，osilverdollarsayear。Shepaidsixdollarsfromthebeginningagraduallyto12。Fromthisinsignifithefee，Iderivedbehousaerthaiostatedabovepossiblyihetilmerelyreadaloudaedbyheart，aeaevertookthetroubletoexplaintohimthemeaningofthewordsmemorized。Ialone，becauseoftheadditioherareprivilegeofhavingeverywordahereadingsexplaiis，trahedeadlahecolloquialdialect。