第28章我爱你,我的好妹妹(1)
ILoveYou,MyTwinSister
佚名Anonymous
Iamahealthytwenty-three-year-oldgirl,bornwithnormalvision,nandwinsister,Dawn,wasnotbornsolucky。Mymotherwasveryyoungwhenshehadgivenbirthtomysisterandme。Becausewewerebornsoearlywewereplacubatorsuhreeweeksold。
&heincubator,thedoioomutomysister。Shewaslaterdiaghcerebralpalsy,anervousdisorderwhichcausesamalfunthesensorymotorskillsandalse。Shehadundergoneseveralunsuccessfulsurgeriesthtletelygoeyeandoableieye。
Alongwithaslowdevelopingbrain,andlegalbliwasalsodetermishewaslegallydeafiear。Shehadtowearbraherlegsaowalkwithcrutches。Shestuckoutlikeasorethumbectedtoallthesetraptions,oftengpeopletostareandpoint。
WhilegrowingupatwimyidentitywasnotmyowbeDoDAWN’STWINSISTER。Welivedinasmallneighborhoodwheremysisterwastheo”child。Wewerebothtlypi,andweneverhadanyfriendsbeysister’s。Ibegantoloathemysister,ahingandanythiotroubletogetbackatherbeiallyretardedandphysicallydisabled。
&likeshewasatthorninmyside。Iwasembarrassedtobeseenwithher,soImadefualongwiththeother。Whewelvemymotherwassodisgustedwithmybehaviortowardsmysister,shefiguredIwasoldenoughtokhatIshouldlovemysisterforwhosheis,forthatisthewayGodcreatedher。
Mymotherthrewmeinmybedroomahickyellowbookwhielikeaphotoalbum。WhatIsawinthatbookgedmylifeandmyattitudeaboutthewaythatIviewedmysisterandotherhandicappedpeoplelikeher。
TherewerenumerousbabypiysisterandIdressedalike,theonlydifferenwashookeduptotubesandneedlesandmaes。Shehadherhandsaapedsothatshewouldnotisethepathereyefrery。Shelookedlikeamummy。Ilookedsmallandpeaceful。
Therewerealsoseveralpicturesofthetwoofusialuhreeyearsold。On,Darappedupinaglorifiedmummyoutfit,withtubesaachedtohereverywhere。Ifyoulookedclosely,youcouldseethepaiedihepicturethatstoodoutthemostshotofthetwoofusinthecribhuggiher。Thebelowread,“Iamsohappytogetavisitfrommytwii。Thedoecry。Shemakesmelaugh。”
Inotionfaallofthepictures:eventhoughshewasidealofpain,andsufferingsomuch,thisbabygirl,whosomewoulddicappedretard,smiledsobigforthecamera。Irealizedthenwhatmymotherwastryingtoshowme。IfeltashamedatthewayItreatedher,andIcriedmyselftosleep。
&evening,mysistercrawledoverandwokemeupfordinner。Ikissedherandhuggedherandprofuselyapologizedformybehavior。Shelookedatmewithuyinhereyes。Ikknoastalkingabout。ButIknew,Iknew。
Fromthatmomenton,Iwasmysister’sproteoonewasgoingtohurtherforanyreason。Iftheintheneighborhooddidnotlaywithusbeysister,sobeit。Wewouldplaywitheachother。Wedidhem。Wewereinseparable。