Well,herewasacoiltobeiedonrecededallthis,butIwasnot。It,darkpuzzletome。Ihadn'ttheleastideawhatthegamewas,herharmwasmeantmeorakiintoapark,andsatdowntotrytothinkitout,andtosiderwhatIhadbestdo。
Attheendofanhshadcrystallizedintothisverdict。
&hosemenmeanmewell,maybetheymeanmeill;nowaytodecidethat-letitgo。They'vegotagame,orascheme,ora,ofsomekindonhand;nowaytodetermiis-letitgo。There'sabetoofindoutwhatitis-letitgo。Thatdisposesoftheiermiies;theremaihematteristangible,solid,andmaybedlabeledwithty。IfIasktheBaoplacethisbilltotheao,they'lldoit,fortheyknowhim,althoughIdon't;buttheywillaskmehoossessionofit,aruth,they'llputmeintheasylum,naturally,andaliewilllandmeinjail。ThesameresultwouldfollowifItriedtobankthebillaoborrowmo。Ihavegottocarrythisimmenseburdenarounduntilthosemeneback,whetherIwanttoornot。Itisuselesstome,asuselessasahandfulofashes,atakecareofit,andwatchoverit,whileIbegmyliving。Ip;apos;tgiveitaway,ifIshouldtry,forhwaymantitormeddlewithitf。Thosebrothersaresafe。EvenifIlosetheirbill,orburillsafe,becausetheyent,andthebankwillmakethemwhole;butmeantimeI'vegottodoamonth'ssufferingrofit-uhatbet,whateveritmaybe,auationthatIampromised。Ishouldliketogetthat;mehavesituatiohatare
Igottothinkingagooddealaboutthatsituatioh。Withoutdoubtthesalarywouldbelarge。ItwouldbegininamoIshouldbeallright。PrettysoonIwasfeelingfirst-rate。BythistimeIisagaiofatailavemeasharplongingtoshedmyrags,andtoyselfdeore。CouldIaffordit?No;Ihadnothingintheworldbutamillionpounds。SoIforcedmyselftogoonby。ButsoonIwasdriftingba。Thetemptatioedmecruelly。Imusthavepassedthatshopbadforthsixtimesduringthatmanfulstruggle。AtlastIgavein;Ihadto。Iaskediftheyhadamisfitsuitthathadbeenthrownontheirhands。ThefellowIspoketonoddedhisheadtowardsanotherfellow,andgavemetotheindicatedfellow,aedahhishead,andnowords。Iwenttohim,andhesaid:
"Tendtoyoupresently。"
Iwaitedtillhehathewasat,theookmeintoaba,andoverhauledapileofrejectedsuits,atiestoon。Itdidn'tfit,andos;tinanywayattractive,butitasanxioustohaveit;soIdidn'tfindanyfault,butsaid,withsomediffidence:
"Itwouldbeanaodationtomeifyoucouldwaitsomedaysforthemoney。Ihaven'tanysmalle。"
Thefellowworkedupamostsarcasticexpressionofdsaid:
"Oh,youhaven't?Well,ofcourse,Ididn'texpectit。I'dolemeege。"
Iwasled,andsaid:
"Myfriend,youshouldn'tjudgeastrangeralwaysbytheclotheshewears。Iamquiteabletopayforthissuit;Isimplydidn'twishtoputyoutothetroubleofgalarge;
Hemodifiedhisstylealittleatthat,andsaid,thoughstillwithsomethingofanair:
"Ididn'tmeananyparticularharm,butaslongasrebukesaregoing,Imightsayitos;tquiteyouraffairtojumptothethatwep;apos;tyyoumighthappentarourary,we。"
Ihaohim,andsaid:
"Oh,veryologize。"
&withasmile,ohesmileswhichgoesallaroundover,andhasfoldsinit,andirals,andlooksliketheplacewhereyouhavethrownabriapoheactofhistakingaglimpseofthebillthissmilefrozesolid,andturnedyellow,ahosewavy,wormyspreadsoflavawhidhardelelevelsonthesideofVesuvius。Ineverbeforesawasmilecaughtlikethat,ahemanstthebill,andlooki,aorhustleduptoseewhatwasthematter,andsaid,briskly:
"os;sup?os;sthetrouble?os;swanting?"
Isaid:"Thereisn'tanytrouble。I'mwaitingfe。"
"e;gethimhishisge。"
Todretorted:"Gethimhisge!It'seasytosay,sir;butlookatthebillyourself。"
&ortookalook,gavealow,eloquehenmadeadiveforthepileofrejectedg,aosnatchitthiswayandthat,talkiimeexdasiftohimself:
"Sellariairesuspeakablesuitasthat!Tod'safool-abornfool。Alwaysdoihihis。Driveseverymillionaireawayfromthisplace,becausehe'ttellamillioramp,andnevercould。Ah,here'sthethingIamafter。Pleasegetthosethingsoff,sir,andthrowthemihefavortoputonthisshirtandthissuit;it'sjustthethihing-plain,rich,modest,andjustduadetonprinayknowhim,sir,hisSereheHospodarofHalifax;hadtoleaveitwithusandtakeam-suitbecausehismoingtodie-whichshedidn't。Butthat&apht;os;talwayshavethihatis,thewaythey-there!trht,theyfityoutoacharm,sir;cai-Lord!lookatthat,hewholething!Ineversahinallmyexperie;
Iexpressedmysatisfa。
&quht,sir,quiteright;it'lldoforamakeshift,I'mboundtosay。Butwaittillyouseeos;llgetupforyouonyourowod,booka。Le;-andsoon。BeforeIcouldgetinawordhehadmeasuredme,andwasgivingordersfordress-suits,msuits,shirts,andallsortsofthiaceIsaid:
"But,mydearsir,I'tgivetheseorders,unlessyouwaitiely,ethebill。""I'saweakword,sir,aweakword。Eternally-that'stheword,sir。Tod,rushthesethingsthrough,aothegentleman'saddresswithoutaime。Lettheminorerswait。Setdowleman'saddressand-"
"I'mgmyquarters。Iwilldropihe;
&quht,sir,quiteright。Omeshowyooodday。"
os;tyouseewhatwasboundtohappeurallyintobuyied,andaskingfe。assumptuouslyequippedwithallneedfulfortsandluxuries,andwashousedinanexpeehotelinHanoverSquare。ItookmydiforbreakfastIstuckbyHarris'shumblefeedinghotmyfirstmealonmymillion-poundbill。IwasthemakingofHarris。Thefaeallabroadthatthefnkwhocarriedmillion-poundbillsiatronsaihatwasenap,littlehand-to-mouthehadbeecelebrated,andovercrowdedwithers。Harriswassogratefulthatheforsuponme,andwouldnotbedenied;andso,pauperasIwas,Ihadmoospend,andwasliviheridthegreat。Ijudgedthattherewasgoingtobeacrashbyandby,butIwasinnowandmustswimacrossordrowherewasjustthatelementofimpendiogiveaseriousside,asoberside,yes,atragicside,toastateofthingswhichwouldotherurelyridithenight,ihetragedypartwasalwaystothefront,andalwayswarning,alwaysthreatening;andsoImoaossed,andsleepwashardtofind。Butinthecheerfuldaylightthetragedyelemeanddisappeared,andIwalkedonair,andytogiddioxiaysay。
Anditwasnatural;forIhadbeeoiesofthemetropolisoftheworld,anditturjustalittle,butagooddeal。Youottakeupaneer,English,Scotch,orIrish,withoutfindinginitoneormorereferehe"vest-pocketmillio;andhislatestdoingsandsaying。Atfirst,iions,Iwasatthebottomossip,Iwaslistedabovethekabovethebaroabovethebarons,andsoon,andsoon,gsteadily,asmyyaugmeilIreachedthehighestaltitudepossible,andthereIremaiakingpreceofalldukesnotroyal,andofallecclesiasticsexcepttheprimateofallEngland。Butmind,thiswasIhadalyhehegstroke-theaccolade,sotospeak-whiasitraheperishabledrossofheenduringgoldoffame:Punchcaricaturedme!Yes,Iwasamademannow;myplacewasestablished。Imightbejokedaboutstill,butreverently,nothilariously,notrudely;Iiledat,buthetimeforthathadgoneby。Punchpicturedmealla-flutterwithrags,digwithabeefeaterfortheTowerofLondon。Well,youehoithayoungfellowwhohadakennoticeofbefore,andnowallofasuddenp;apos;tsayathingthatos;ttakenupaedeverywhere;p;apos;tstirabroadwithouttlytheremarkflyingfromliptolip,&quoes;that'shim!"p;apos;ttakehisbreakfastwithoutacrowdtolookon;p;apos;tappearinanopera-boxwithouttratihefireofathes。Why,Ijustswamingloryalldaylong-thatistheamountofit。
Youkmyoldsuits,andeverynowandthehem,soastohavetheoldpleasureofbuyingtrifles,andbeihenshootingthescofferdeadwiththemillion-poundbill。ButIp;apos;tkeepthatup。TheillustratedpapersmadetheoutfitsofamiliarthatwheinitIwasatnizedandfollowedbyadifIattemptedapurchasethemanwouldoffermehiswholeshopobeforeIcouldpullmynoteonhim。
AboutthetenthdayofmyfameIwenttofulfilmydutytomyflagbypayiheAmeriister。Hereceivedmewiththeenthusiasmproperinmycase,upbraidedmefsotardyinmyduty,andsaidthattherewasoogethisfivehatwastotaketheseatathisdihatbytheillnessofoneofhisguests。IsaidIwould,aalking。Itturhatheandmyfatherhadbeensatesinboyhood,Yalestudeer,andalwayswarmfriendsuptomyfather'sdeath。SothenherequiredmetoputinathishousealltheoddtimeImighthavetospare,andIwasverywilling,ofcourse。
Infact,Iwasmorethanwilling;Iwasglad。Whenthee,hemightsomehowbeabletosavemefromtotaldestru;Ididn'tknowhow,buthemightthinkofaway,maybe。Ip;apos;tveounbosommyselftohimatthislatedate,athingwhichIwouldhavebeenquicktodointhebeginningofthisawfulineinLondon。No,Ip;apos;tvenow;Iwasiis,toodeepformetrevelationstosohoughnotydepth,asIlookedatit。Because,yousee,withallmyb,Iwascarefullykeepingwithinmymeahinmysalary。Ofcourse,Ip;apos;tknowwhatmysalarywasgoiIhadagoodenoughbasisforahefact,thatifIwoohavechoiysituationinthatritleman'sgiftprovidedIetent-andIshouldlyprovepetent;Ihadn'tanydoubtaboutthat。Andastothebet,Iaboutthat;Ihadalwaysbeenluyestimateofthesalarywassixhuhousandayear;say,sixhuhefirstyear,andsoonupyearbyyear,tillIstrucktheupperfigurebyprovedmerit。AtpresentIwasoformyfirstyear'ssalary。EverybodyhadbeentryingtoleIhadfoughtoffthemostofthemoorahisiededonly£300borrowedmoher£300representedmykeepandmypurchases。Ibelievedmysedyear'ssalarywouldcarrymethroughtherestofthemonthifIweiousandeidIiolooksharplyoutforthat。Mymonthended,myemployerbahisjourney,Ishouldbeallrightoncemore,forIshouldatomycreditorsbyassig,adowntomywork。
Itwasalovelydiyoffourteen。TheDukeandDuchessofShoreditdtheirdaughtertheLadyAnne-Graor-d-so-forth-and-so-forth-deBohun,theEarlandtessofCheapside,LordandLadyBlatherskite,someuntitledpeopleofbothsexes,theministerandhiswifeanddaughter,andhisdaughter'svisitingfriend,anEnglishgirloftwenty-tham,whomIfellihintwominutes,ahme-Icouldseeitwithoutglasses。Therewasstilla,aIamalittleaheadofmystory。Whilethepeoplewerestillinthedrawing-room,whettingupfordinner,andspegthelateers,theservantannounced:
"Mr。LloydHastings。"